Benedictine Spirituality from a Lay Person: Chastity (part 3 of 7)

Two common definitions of chastity involve either some idea of abstinence or plainness of style. In both cases, chastity is typically defined as a noun. But no matter how I see the meaning of the word chastity, I am hard-pressed to view it as an action or state of being. To view it as a noun, I feel a sense of ownership, like the word itself has its own entity or is a part of something, adding up to the whole of that being. 

Chastity is more than a way of life; it is respect of that [chaste] life. 

How did I arrive at that conclusion after years of understanding that chastity means abstinence? It is from that one morning meeting talking about Benedictine spirituality.

In Benedictine spirituality, chastity is defined as having a “right relationship” with people in consideration of God, others, and self. In other words, it is how you love God, others, and yourself.  Love is a powerful and often misinterpreted word. It can be used to deceive or it can unite. 

Probably my favorite line in the Old Testament reads: “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge; wisdom and instruction fools despise” (Proverbs 1:7). Often considered the basis of religion, to me it’s my relationship/my love of God. Respecting God is the beginning of understanding what he wants for me; to ignore Him would be foolish. Not only in Scripture does God teach us, but He also showed us in person by sending His only Son to us. God wants us to love Him by living through the examples Jesus left for us. He loved his Father by reciprocating that love to others through respect.

As a FOCCUS couple with my wife for our church, the stats on divorce, pre-marital co-habitation, and pre-marital/casual sex in today’s society doesn’t surprise me, but it does concern me. I find that the cause of these stats stem from selfishness—the loss of respect for others. Chastity is more than abstinence until marriage or a religious vow. It’s about the right relationship of love and respect; the two cannot survive without the other in terms of sex. I could go on forever on this topic alone, but let’s just say that I believe sex to be a beautiful gift from God, extended through the Sacrament of Marriage, as the ultimate sign a couple’s  love and respect for each other; not as a casual affair just to satisfy one’s own needs.

So how can I love God or another person if I don’t love myself? The answer is: you can’t. Why do you think psychiatrists charge what they do an hour? Many people face this self-deprecating dilemma every day. Believe me, I’ve been there. It’s impossible to show love and respect to others, let alone to God, if you don’t love and respect yourself. As I said before: Chastity is about having that “right relationship,” based on love and respect for God, others, AND self. It’s not one out of three or two of the three. It’s all three together.

…God Bless…

[my next blog: Benedictine Spirituality from a lay person: Poverty (part 4 of 7)]

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Featured image: Piyaphon/freedigitalphotos.net

Michael Glassmeyer is a life-long Catholic who has spent the past several years examining his own faith and beliefs in an attempt to understand the beliefs and actions of others involving local, state, national, and world events. He looks to pursue a master’s degree in lay pastoral ministry and eventually go into the Permanent Deacon Formation program. Michael lives in his hometown of Cincinnati, Ohio and is married with two children. blog comments powered by

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Benedictine Spirituality from a Lay Person: Obedience (part 2 of 7)

Obedience, in regard to Benedictine spirituality, is about listening with the “ear” of your heart to God, self, and others. The Old Testament reads, “Sacrifice and offerings you do not want, but ears open to obedience you gave me… To do your will is my delight; my God, your law is in my heart” (Psalm 40:7-9). In the New Testament, this is repeated with Jesus in his Incarnation, but with a twist: “Sacrifice and offering you do not desire, but a body you prepared for me” (Hebrews 10:5). God gave us his word and opened our “ears” through the life of his only son, Jesus Christ, to be the example of true worship. 

The Greek philosopher Plato pondered the question of what would become of a perfectly just person in this world. He concluded that such a person would be crucified. Jesus responded to James and John’s request for seats in the Kingdom by saying: “…the Son of Man did not come to be served but to serve and give his life as ransom for many” (Mark 10:45). 

So is obedience to be understood as worship and worship to be understood as sacrifice? 

The answer is yes, obedience is worship and yes, worship is to be understood as sacrifice… spiritually. Pope Benedict XVI recognizes obedience—living within and on the basis of God’s word—as the right way to worship God. So here the idea of spiritual sacrifice, or “sacrifice in the manner of the word,” was formulated: prayer, the self-opening of the human spirit to God, is true worship.

The meaning of obedience is found in the Cross. Through Jesus’ prayerful ministry to the masses during his life, his prayerful demeanor during the Passion, and the prayerful fulfillment of God’s kingdom in his resurrection, he showed us how to listen to God, to others, and to ourselves. The common thread is prayer; nothing more and nothing less than open, honest, two-way communication from the depths of our hearts.

In the Gospels we hear how Mary, the Mother of God took all these things into her heart. Simply put, she prayed. Blessed Teresa of Calcutta (aka: Mother Teresa) looked to the Cross to live her life through prayer. For me, it’s tough, but I’m trying. I fail at times, but try to learn. I pray so that I may strengthen my faith with God. I pray so I can better hear in my heart the true path God wants me to follow. I pray so that I may truly help those I come across in my daily life. I pray so that I can understand my true needs and break the chains of burden that keep me down. I pray; I listen whole-heartedly; I accept, no matter the outcome… at least I try. That is what God truly wants from me and for me, from each of us and for each of us. This is true worship. This is being obedient to God.

… God Bless…

[my next blog: Benedictine Spirituality from a Lay Person: Chastity (part 3 of 7)]

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photo credit: dan/freedigitalphotos.net

Michael Glassmeyer is a life-long Catholic who has spent the past several years examining his own faith and beliefs in an attempt to understand the beliefs and actions of others involving local, state, national, and world events. He looks to pursue a master’s degree in lay pastoral ministry and eventually go into the Permanent Deacon Formation program. Michael lives in his hometown of Cincinnati, Ohio and is married with two children. blog comments powered by

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Benedictine Spirituality from a Lay Person: Introduction (part 1 of 7)

As Christians, we are blessed that God has given us so many sources to draw from to help us strengthen and grow in our faith. Imagine a tree, which starts as a seed in the ground and begins to sprout roots, breaking through the soil as a helpless sapling. The roots grow in various directions, pulling in nutrients from different areas of the ground. It also takes CO2 and sunlight through its leaves for energy as the tree’s branches spread out through the air. Because of these sources, that sapling begins to blossom into a beautiful, mature tree. In return, the tree provides more than just esthetic beauty: it feeds, shelters, shades, and gives off oxygen.

Where can we spread our “roots” in search of spiritual nutrients? Look what God has given us: the Mass; Eucharist; sacraments; Scripture and Church teachings; prayers; his own Son, Jesus Christ; the angels and saints; a number of religious orders…the list goes on. My point is simple:

When the tree’s roots stop growing, the tree stops growing; when our “roots” stop reaching out, we stop growing and settle to do “just enough.”  When the tree’s roots stop taking in the ground source of nutrients, it begins to die; so do we as we stop “feeding” from the nutrients of God-given sources around us. We need to remember that our spirituality is a personal journey among the countless journeys of others. Just as we are unique creatures ourselves, our journey is unique to each of us. We are all on converging paths, with one common, God-given goal: to live eternally as one family in the Kingdom of God.

God has a plan for each of us and like a caring, loving father, only wants the best for each of us. Through His love for us, God gives us free will to live our own lives in freedom and He hopes, like any good parent, we accept the help and guidance available along the way as we go down the path of our own journey through life on Earth. It’s up to us to steer the course.

There are three vows that many religious take: Obedience, Chastity, and Poverty. The Benedictine order includes two more: Stability and “Conversatio,” and all together they become the moral fibers of Benedictine spirituality. In my following blogs, I will take a brief look at each “vow” to understand spirituality from their perspective and how I have interpreted them with respect to my spiritual journey. With open minds and hearts let’s spread our roots and begin to look into this God-given source.

…God Bless…

Sources: Rev. Mr. Conrad Kolis, Deacon, St. James of the Valley, Cincinnati, OH.  Fr. Brendan Moss, O.S.B., professor, St. Meinrad College.

[My next blog post: Benedictine Spirituality from a Lay Person: Obedience (part 2 of 7) ]

Photo credit: dan/freedigitalphotos.net

Michael Glassmeyer is a life-long Catholic who has spent the past several years examining his own faith and beliefs in an attempt to understand the beliefs and actions of others involving local, state, national, and world events. He looks to pursue a master’s degree in lay pastoral ministry and eventually go into the Permanent Deacon Formation program. Michael lives in his hometown of Cincinnati, Ohio and is married with two children. blog comments powered by

View the original article here